Written @ 10:56 a.m. on 2007-07-19
Granddad Passes On
My grandfather died today. He came to me in a dream, and I said,"Well, you've been doing this dying thing for years. I really think you ought to die already." I guess I'm very blunt on the astral plane.Then, I checked my email, and my father had emailed the whole family to let us know that he passed away at 9 am.
He was so frail. He hasn't been able to think or carry on a conversation for about ten years. His body was dying and he required around the clock care. Still, occasionally, he would come out with jokes at just the right moment. Sometimes he would be totally present. I think he worried about leaving my grandmother alone. He hung on for her.
My grandfather was a very tough man. He never wrote me a note or sent me a gift, that I can recall. He never called me. When I visited him, he would show me his amazing gardens, and he would drink scotch, and tell jokes, or make mean comments about everyone. Everyone would argue. I remember trying very very hard to be perfect while we were there so as to not rock the boat. We visited about twice a year, even though they lived pretty close. I do remember being very small and playing "skin the cat" with him...holding his hands,climbing up his legs and flipping myself over. He never said I love you, he never really made me realize that he knew I was there. He liked to walk. I guess I inherited that from him, and a hawkish profile, and his last name.
He made a lot of money. He came from poverty and built an empire. He travelled all over the world. He had a loving wife and three children. Why wasn't he nicer?
Nobody is crying over his passing accept for my Grandmother. So, we focus on those who feel the ache. I called her this morning, and she said that she was fine accept her legs wouldn't work. She'd get up to do something and they just wouldn't go. I told her that it was just fine to sit in one place, and that my parents were on their way there, and that I would come saturday.
I spoke to my father, and he sounded fine. He wrote a nice obituary a month ago.
I hope my children miss me when I go. I hope I have given my grandchildren a thousand hugs and that I know each of their favorite colors.
Never have I seen more clearly illustrated how much more important love is than money.