Written @ 11:45 a.m. on 2007-07-22
The day after
Yesterday I felt very sad and very scared. My mother told me that I better cheer up for the sake of the girls. My mom is all about "put on a happy face" but I feel like displaying authentic emotions is ok, too. I spoke to P. about this.
Me-Granny thinks I should act cheery so that I don't make you feel sad, but I'm not feeling cheery. I'm still sad about yesterday.
P-I don't want to talk about it.
Me-I know. What do you think? Do you think I should be cheery like Granny says?
P- I think that it is good to talk about your feelings, Mom.
Me- Ok. So, I feel a little sad still, but we are not going to make this a sad day. What should we do that is fun?
P- I don't know.
Me-Think!
P- Um, go to the wicca store, and the toy store, and walk around all of the pretty shops down there? Like we did at christmas time because we got lost and couldn't find the concert we tried to go to? Remember?
Me- Yes! That is an excellent idea. What should I wear?
P- I will pick out your outfit!
P. picked out my fanciest black, low cut dress. I left my tear-stained sweats and put on high heels. N., P. and I all headed out for a girls day of boutique-ing on the cheap. There is a historical area near here with art galleries, cobblestone streets, and old buildings, and lots of fancy little shops. I wanted to talk to the witch at the wicca shop anyway. Just as anyone might turn to a pastor, I spoke with her.
I showed her the PFA. She gave me some advice, and gave us each a stone to take home. I know that there is nothing that she can do for me that I can't do for myself. I'm not expecting a hex or something, just the kind shoulder of an older, like-minded woman. I was impressed that P. decided to go there, all on her own. She is so kind to the girls. They pet her dove that clucks like a chicken.
We went to the most fabulous toystore, and N picked out two dollar fifty books of paper dolls. She paid for them with her own pocket money, and was quite pleased. P was overwhelmed by the choices and couldn't find a small thing for herself, so I told her that I would give her an "I OWE YA". That means if we are at the grocery store, or the bookstore,or the carwash or whatever, and if she asks me for something...normally I would say,"We can't afford it." If I say that, she can say, "I want my "I owe ya"", and I will buy it. I would have to. I would have NO CHOICE. I am bound by the strict rules of "I OWE YA". She was quite pleased with that deal.
We found the sweetest little celtic shop with all sorts of things from ireland. I wanted to buy everything. I wanted the wooly blankets, I wanted a kilt for B., I wanted the lovely irish perfume that we squirted all over the three of us. I wanted all of the lovely artwork on the handmade cards. I wanted the books. ALL of the books. They also had a gorgeous little tea room, just perfect for the day. It was all supposed to be very authentic, with special teas from around the world, and scones,and fish and chips and the like. We had a sit down, and I almost passed out looking at the prices, but the girls where quite happy with cookies and shortbread, and I had a CUP of potato leek and a LOVELY, lovely glass of iced tea. We had plates with flowers on them. It was perfect for the day.
I got home and went into a depression, but most of the day was beautiful.