Written @ 9:25 a.m. on 2007-09-11
praying mantis

After changing my room around to gain new perspective, I have found that I cannot sleep properly with said new perspective. One night was spent thrashing about after drinking too much caffiene. Ideally, I want to be able to stay up til 2 to work, and then fall asleep like a baby. But, I over medicate, and don't fall asleep right at all, and get up at 7 feeling like dog vomit.

Yesterday, I was so tired and grouchy, but avoided the happy drinks. I fell asleep at 6:30 last night, and B. came over and put the girls to bed. Sometime in the night, I woke up throwing up and seriously ill all over the place. Guhhh. I remember at some point laying on the cold tile of the bathroom, and B, being B, didn't try to get me up, he just brought me a pillow. He sat up all night to watch me. He doesn't normally sleep at night, being nocturnal, but he did stay close by for me.

When I opened my eyes this morning, I was back in bed. It is now facing my hallway, and looking through the hallway, and out the window over the rooftops of my neighborhood,over three story brick residences, laundromats and chiropractors, what was the first thing to greet my blurry eyes?

A gigantic praying mantis clinging to the outside of my window!

I took a picture, and once I figure how to get iphoto to upload it you will see this amazing work of God. Fucking amazing. It's as long as my hand, and not scared of me a bit. N. had been reading about these creatures in Ranger Rick or something, and had developed quite a fascination with them, but we had never actually come across one in real life. I ran to the bedroom and announced,"Wake up! We have a praying mantis!"

The girls all started running around screaming in their little wee nightshirts. "A praying mantis! A praying mantis! This is so exciting! He rips of the heads of bugs and eats them! But he is harmless to humans! If you look it up in a book it will tell you he is a harmless animal and now we have one on our window right now! You can never hurt them! They are very rare! Oh my god! Oh my god! A praying mantis!"

Here I am spending money on icecream and american girl dolls and trips to the zoo, and all I really needed to bring joy to my little girls' hearts was a dumb giant bug?

I believe that, living in my magickal reality, moving my bed destroys my sleep, and praying mantae bring good luck. In my mailbox was a letter telling me I forgot to cash my tax refund check and would I like to try again? It was 48 dollars, and I remember it exactly. I didn't forget to cash it, I refused to cash it out of disgust because it should have been like, four thousand. I should have gotten a child tax credit, but only one parent can get it, and I wasn't it. But, now I believe I'm over it and yes, I would like my 48 dollars thankyou very much.

Thankyou praying mantis.

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