Written @ 12:10 p.m. on 2007-11-08
sighhhhhhhhhhhh
I might be depressed. Or, I might just have nothing to say. I've been sleeping a lot.
B. is irritating the fuck out of me. I made him sleep at home last night because he was grating on my very last nerve. He doesn't sleep, and then he's silently pissy, and then he'll act REAL nice, and do this martyr thing that may actually cause me to do him physical harm. Like, he'll wash my dirty dishes (super nice, normally, right?) but he'll do it silently, miserably, and with exaggerated sighs that make me want to say,"GET AWAY FROM MY DISHES BEFORE I GOUGE YOUR EYES OUT!" Which, ahem, wouldn't be very nice of me.
I have never met ANYONE who sighs like B. What. The. Fuck. I can tell his mood from my desk when he is walking up the stairs to my apartment by these loud sighs that he will accept no responsiblity for. "What, you want me to stop breathing?!?"
No. I just want you to realize how much of a negative comment you are making by doing that. Sighhhhhhhhh.
We went to the zoo. B. saw a no smoking sign and lets out this sigh.
WHAT!? ARE WE SURPRISED THAT YOU CAN'T SMOKE AT THE PETTING ZOO!?!?!? Why don't you just light the zebras on fire yourself, for christ sake.
Me-What was that for?
Him-What?
Me-That sigh. What was that sigh? What is wrong?!
Him-Nothing.
Me-WHAT! WHAT! WHAT!
Him-There's no smoking, I guess.
Me-Yeah. I guess.
Him-Sigh.
Me-What is your problem?
Him-I didn't even say anything.
Me-That sighing! My god!
Him-I'm fine.I'm just tired.
Me-Well, get some sleep next time.
Him-Sigh.
Me-Ok, I'm walking away now. I'm going to hangout with some ducks or something.
So, I'm a bitch. Total newsflash, I'm sure. He is taking away from my good time. I want to be "Yay! The zoo! First one to see an animal poop wins!" and I'm stuck with 180 lb dead weight. It bums me out. N. is already morose, which I think is actually her natural personality, so, pretty much, it's P. and me having a good time and everyone else can eat our dust.
It also makes me afraid for the future. If he's like this now, what's he going to be like when he's sixty??? My mother is Miss Light and Lively, and my dad doesn't do much anymore, but ride his motorcycle. It wasn't that way when I was a kid. My dad was planning all sorts of adventures...backpacking, canoeing, every year we had a carolling party and he dressed up in silly clothes and sang christmas carols. Yeah, mostly he was innebriated, but he always put the energy in. Now, he's a toadstool. Am I marrying another toadstool?
Maybe its not him. Maybe its me. I'm bored.