Written @ 1:08 p.m. on 2007-09-12
Bunny
The bunny ate the playpen I rescued from the garbage and transformed into a little rabbit playground. He dug an escape route, which is what a rabbit would do in the wild, right? My rabbit is not domesticated. It chews, it digs, and it has no use for me. When I get money, I'm going to buy it a rabbit jungle gym that it cannot eat, and I'm going to MAKE it like me. I'm going to be so nice, and talk so sweet, and feed it nice foods.
If it still doesn't like me, I'm setting it loose. I swear to god I will. Why didn't anyone tell me that rabbits are such an uncool pet? Cats don't really like you, but my rabbit actively dislikes me and holds little "We hate Hil" war rallies under my bed when I'm trying to sleep.
Persephone: "You build me a playground? I spit on your playground! Once I find your matches I light your silly bunny playground on fire! Ha! Then I spit in that fire!"
Me:"Dude, what's with the attitude, man? I thought you'd be fuzzy and we could watch tv together?"
Persephone:"The only thing that is fuzzy around here is your fucking fat ass!"
Me:"Now, that is unnecessary. Have a carrot. Nice? Carrot..."
Persephone:"Get me a bottle of Gin. And one of your shoes! Then leave me alone. Looking at you hurts my eyes."
It's kinda like that.